6:10 a.m. - 2005-05-08
A Litte Vacation? Ha!
Trying to decide whether to walk now, or retreat back to bed for another hour of sleep. Everyone is coming here for Mother's day lunch. Should be fun. I got some fun small gifts for the sisters as well as one for daughter. She's a full time nanny, so hell...you might as well call her a mother! She is much more involved with the kid than his own.
I've been thinking more lately about my big trip with Gigi in June. (Gigi is the cutesy little name I came up with for grandmother.) She's a tough nut to crack...86, still in relatively good health with only minimal dementia, but miserable most of the time. Because nobody comes to see her, because she sits home all day watching television. (Even though I've encouraged her to go to the mealsite, where she can be with her own kind (?) We can barely stand to visit...her every thought is usually tied into some vulgar prejudice or criticism of someone, her particular favorite is pointing out how FAT someone is. (not MY favorite since I'm hovering somewhere around 50 pounds overweight) She's quite vain, has worked to maintain her size 8 or 10 figure all her life and still thinks she's the "belle of the ball". She does look pretty good for her age, but Belle? It ain't happenin.
So WHY did I volunteer to take her for a four day trip via airplane (she's only flown ONCE) to see the flowers in North Carolina? Guilt. There were times when I was a child that I actually enjoyed visiting her home. She was a good cook, had a nice yard filled with fruit of all kind, and from what I remember she was more pleasant then. Or maybe it was just an escape from my unpleasant home life? So I promised earlier this year I'd take her. I don't figure she has too many years left.
I did arrange a vacation a couple years back to NC to see leaves turn (thought she'd enjoy that....but all she could talk about was the flowers in June, and that being her favorite time to visit). She and Mom came with us and it was a pretty good time for us except that she was an early to bed, early to riser and the sounds of her fumbling with the microwave for what seemed like days, woke us up at 6 a.m. every morning. She also whined that her bedroom had no tv and she's used to watching tv until she falls asleep, but I was damned well not giving up the master with the hot tub!
Then there was all the complaining about how steep the road was, backseat driving, etc etc. You get the picture.
I'm hoping that I can capture some kind of good memory from the June trip. I plan on talking to her extensively with IPOD recorder in hand (or hidden from sight, whatever it takes) and gathering some information. I know she had a rough childhood...was oldest of 6 and pretty much a slave until she married. I know she was married for over 50 years to a man she didn't really love, and constantly wanted things she didn't have, mainly more travel and social life (grandfather was somewhat a hermit). Her hubby used to follow her around in the mornings reading the paper to her and it disgusted her! Bet she'd take that now anyday rather than be alone..... I can't see that she ever had passion for ANYTHING in her life and that is very, very sad.
Four days. It could seem like months. I'm trying to keep an open mind, but it isn't easy. At best I figure she retires around 6 or 7, I go and sit on the porch, gazing at the mountains, drinking a little wine (or whatever?) and writing or reading. Can't be all bad....
