11:38 p.m. - 2013-09-12
Change Teams!
oh hell. I thinking I'm "turning" again. Just when my family had sighed a relief that I'd turned from my wicked ways.
I'm being dramatic. They were pretty accepting. But my relationship was never a good one so that put strain on all of us.
But I'm sitting here browsing and writing and listening to Missy Higgins. I'm absolutely loving each and every song that has played. I think I'm more suited for a lady, I'm afraid. I miss the comfort of the intimacy of being in love with your best friend, a friend who understood your bitchy ways. And would cry with you when you hurt, or at least cuddle. Oh, the cuddling.
This is going to be fun. My family will have to regroup again. People will say I'm "confused" And i should not give a rat's ass what anyone thinks, with the possible exception of my kids.... I am almost 55. It's time to grow up. And grow balls. If things go the way I think they will with Bill, sadly, I will take a hiatus to breathe. And then I perhaps will be reaching out to the ladies. I have so much more to offer now. I have fidelity. I will never ever put anyone through that pain after feeling pain for myself. If the train stops this time, it's the final stop. Good, bad, or ugly if I make the commitment.
Another day in the life....This music is so like "home" :)
