9:39 p.m. - 2009-11-09
Random thoughts tonight on things...
Home from a great night out with the kids. Things just get better and better with them. My stomach isn't feeling so well though...Sonny's just didn't agree..
Waiting for Diana to get home from bowling. Things have really turned around for us. It's just amazing to me how I landed on my feet this time... I have been truly blessed. She's treating me very well, and I am returning the same to her. I watch her interact with others, observe her generous heart and personality, and just thank God that I didn't screw up this one. When I think of the hell that my life could have been if I'd been stuck with the "wrong" choice. It's not pleasant. My mind always told me that it wasn't right....and I only wish I'd listened to my instincts a very long time ago. I have such feelings of contempt for myself and for the other woman thinking that we did this to Diana....that we didn't have the decency to stop the madness sooner... But life is about moving on....and appreciating what you have NOW and I am spending my days doing just that. And learning from my mistakes. I will not walk that path again. And I hope that the other woman learned the same.
I got a call from an old friend tonight and she went through a nightmare with her partner. He nearly died and we talked about how fragile life is. I need to remind myself daily of this....savor each moment....and live life like each could be my last. It's a hard habit to pick up, given my history of dwelling on the past and worrying about the future...but I think I can make progress. I KNOW I can!!!
