9:07 p.m. - 2009-09-10
Life sucks
another day of stress and strain. Diana wasn't feeling well so I laid on the bed with her reading. She began to get upset, talking about our relationship, that I knew it wouldn't work, etc. She went and took a hot bath. She pulled me into the water, fully clothed and things began to get a little better, or so I thought. Til she said that she was such a fool, and how stupid she was to ever leave her other relationship for me.
WHY am I staying somewhere I'm clearly not wanted. I really do love this woman, but has too much water passed under the bridge? I don't know what to think or feel except numb. There were good times, alot of them. I don't know why we cant have more....and no relationships are not easy. Diana seems to think that everything should be wonderful all the time. Maybe because that was the way her last relationship was....I guess that's why she ditched it so quickly to jump on board with me????
I'm so sick of this. Something has to give soon, or I'm going to have an ulcer, heart attack, or nervous breakdown.
