6:24 a.m. - 2005-04-20
Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, it's off to work I go....
Just finished my walk. I can hardly believe I'm the same person who used to run from exercise like the plague. I guess I finally hit the right combination....great music, nobody out to distract me, cool air....whatever it is, it's definitely working.
I have so many ideas running through my mind while walking that sometimes I am almost in a trance-like state. When I snap out of it I find I'm not fully aware of where I am. Good thing I walk the same route every day. Auto-pilot takes over.
Working on the window yesterday was amazingly good. I only turned in a handful of money, but I have three people I waited on tell me how sincerely grateful they were that I took the time to help them. (Older folks that needed just a little bit more) I know the push is for revenue now but with my constantly improving self image I'm finding I want to be helpful to others and I'm putting a premium on that. We'll see how long it takes my co-workers to start complaining that I'm taking too long with customers.
During the course of the day I met a very sweet woman, who in conversation told me her son had been murdered (am I the only one who solicits conversation that ends up in full life-story confessions....do I just have that kind of face?) and she was in the process of selling his "big boy toys". He had a nice fifth wheel trailer and it sounds like something we just might be interested in. I had that weird feeling I get sometimes where I feel a connection with a customer. She told me she lost three kids during her life. Two to murder, and one who died as a child. I can't even fathom losing ONE child, much less three. I asked her how she survived so much tragedy and she said "The Lord got me through it". She was a breath of fresh air. Hubby wants to low-ball her on the trailer and I told him he damn well better not. If he sincerely wants it he'd better make her a fair offer. I'm not into raping someone who's already had so much trouble in life, and still maintained a good attitude. (not that I AM into raping others???)
If only I didn't have to go to work. I could sure enjoy life more...haha PATIENCE!
I got "THE TALK" yesterday. Knew it was coming. Attendance issues. Our new supervisor (changes almost daily) is a woman who, on the surface appears to be someone who actually might be fair. I explained to her that with my commute, dropping off the boy, and all the construction on the highway I'd been having some trouble fine-tuning the drive time. She asked if there was any way they could help me, perhaps adjust my schedule by a few minutes. I don't want that....I'm already late getting home with the 30 minute commute. So I came up with an idea...I'll try two weeks of fine tuning and see if I can get it right and if I am late one day during that period, we'll talk about changing my schedule. Sounded fair to both of us. I really don't want to be there any later in the evening....but I'm trying to do the right thing now that I'm "sane" again.
I'm sure people at work think I'm on drugs again. Last time I was this happy my supervisor actually asked me that question. Sad commentary on my many mood swings. I think I'm on the right path now, and feel confident that I'll stay here. R asked me what I had to be so damn happy about and I told him I "knew the secret". When he asked me what it was, I replied...."You're not ready.....when the student is ready, the teacher will appear." He probably thinks I'm on drugs too...haha
